Subject: [KFFDISC] Of Love and Circumstance [chapter 2] Date: Sat, 04 May 2002 13:11:41 -0400 From: Jessica Entis Reply-To: kffdisc@nabiki.com To: kffdisc@nabiki.com Of Love and Circumstance Part 2 By Calger459 ~*~ Kamiya Kaoru. That is her name, this courageous, spirited, reckless girl who captured my attention so unexpectedly this morning. It is early afternoon now and we are standing together in her dojo, staring at the short row of student placards on the wall. A part of me cringes at the anger in her voice as she describes "Battousai's" recent activities: slaying random people in her school's name, slandering her family and driving her students away. I remember the words of Ari Shakkuu, the man who gave me my Sakabatou ten years ago: “You can't just run away from all the lives you've taken after so long. If you live by the sword, you die by the sword. That should be the only way you can follow.” I didn’t want to believe him then, but since then his words have proved true time and again. No matter where I go or how long I wander, my past is always there, waiting for an opportunity to cause more suffering. It's my fault that this has happened to her. If I had never lived such a dark, bloody life, and especially if I hadn't lived it so *prominently*, then there would be no Battousai legend for corrupt men to use to their own selfish ends. She finishes her story and looks over at me. I imagine she’s waiting for my opinion, but I find that I can’t answer her. I can only return her gaze with one of sadness. I think my expression surprise her a little; eyes wide, she opens her mouth to say something, but right then the dojo door slides open to reveal Genzai-sensei, grandfather of the two little girls. Whatever she had been about to say hangs silent and tense in the air. As for me, I turn away abruptly to hide my emotions, which are betraying me. Damn that swordsman! Somehow, he will pay for this… ~*~ I tidy up the shed before slipping quietly out, relocking it behind me. I am amused she thought I would stay put with just a block of wood laid across the door, but then she still doesn’t know who and what I really am, which is how it will stay. I don’t intend to return here; I’ve caused her enough trouble already. But still, her earlier words echo in my mind. “He’s the Hitokiri Battousai, right? He’s a bloodthirsty murderer! To protect my father’s style, I will defeat him!” A murderer? Yes, many times over. Bloodthirsty? No…no, never that, not even in the darkest of Kyoto’s nights. “What does a rurouni like you know? Don’t speak as if you know!” Childish as her reaction had been, I really couldn’t blame her. I had spoken of her father as if I somehow knew his intentions, his wishes. I’m usually not so bold, but they were words I felt she needed to hear. You’re right Kaoru, I don’t know much, but the truth is that this false Battousai must be stopped, and if anyone should risk his life, it should be me. I pray I’m not too late. ~*~ “Remove that hand from her.” I haven’t slept in almost two days, so I’m not surprised that I feel a bit ill. However, I cannot afford to let queasy tiredness affect me; when I saw the well-armed men gathered at her gate I knew that time had run out. Before arriving here I had tracked the false Battousai all night, his trail eventually leading me back to the dojo. As I had suspected, the swordsman must be a former student of the Kamiya School, seeking revenge for some past wrong. I enter now to find the man-giant standing at the far end of the dojo, holding Kaoru off the floor by the front of her gi. He sneers at the sound of my voice and turns to face me. “I remember you from yesterday.” The morning sun is warm on my back and I feel strangely calm as I answer him. “Yes, and I should have defeated you then.” Kaoru’s voice rings out, shrill and full of worry. “No, you can’t possibly beat him!” A part of me laughs at the irony. People always underestimate me because of my size and delicate appearance. That fact ceased to bother me long ago. In fact, more often than not, it serves as an advantage to me in battle. The tone in her voice though…she can’t be worried for *me* can she? We don’t even know each other… “How amusing. I suppose you’re another fool talking about swords revitalizing people!” I suppose I did once…when I was young and naďve, a long, long time ago. “No.” I walk slowly forward, my master’s words coming clearly to my mind. “A sword is a weapon. Swordsmanship is learning how to kill. That is the truth. What Kaoru-dono says is play-talk that only those who have never stained their hands can say.” My words are cruel…but I believe them with all my heart. “However…” I look up at the girl and see dismay on her face. What could she be thinking? “However, I prefer Kaoru-dono’s play-talk to the truth. In the world to come, I hope her words become the truth.” Dismay turns to a surprised, hopeful smile. Those words I also mean with all my soul. The bloodshed has gone on long enough. The man-giant—I believe his men called him Gohei?—grinds his teeth in anger. “Kill this fool!” Shishou was right about one thing; my sword and face really do attract the worst kind of trouble, so I’ve been no stranger to fighting in recent years, despite my efforts to live in peace. I hardly break a sweat defeating Gohei’s men; in only moments they all are unconscious or cowering against the walls in fear. Now there is only Gohei…and the amazed, awe-struck stare of Kaoru. Ah, she was not expecting such a thing from me. Well, I’m about to upset her again. “The swordsmanship of Hitokiri Battousai is not Kamiya Kasshin Ryu nor whatever original style you use.” My words are for Gohei, but it’s Kaoru’s gaze I meet. “He uses Hiten Mitsurugi Ryu, a style sure to slay anyone without fail unless used with a sword like this one.” Her face goes slack with shock. “You…y-you mean you’re the real hitokiri?!” Emotions flash across her face like a flock of startled birds, almost too fast for me to follow. Surprise, awe, anger, and…fear? Yes, for an instant she is afraid. No doubt she’s heard the same stories as Gohei, rumors and legends that in certain aspects have become so exaggerated with time she was easily convinced a man such as Gohei was the real Battousai. What must she think of me now? As I stare into her deep blue eyes I suddenly feel ashamed for keeping such a secret from her. I remember her words from yesterday when she invited me to stay the night at her dojo. Astonished at her trusting nature, I’d asked if she was sure; after all, she didn’t even know who I was. “Well, you did save me, and I don’t care about other people’s pasts. I see no need to question you further.” I had been so happy when she’d said that, released from a fear I hadn’t been able to admit even to myself. What is it about this girl that makes her stand out in my mind; what gives her this power over my emotions? I don’t get any further in my thoughts, because Gohei chooses that moment to set her firmly on the floor and approach me with sword raised. “Fine then, if I defeat you then I’m assured to be the strongest man!” I’ve always despised men like you, Gohei. Your kind are all rude arrogance and brute strength. You have no compassion, no honor, and no reason for me to grant you mercy. Fortunately for you, this is not the Bakumatsu, and I am no longer a hitokiri. “I guess I have no choice, then.” “Die, Battousai!” He hardly gets the words out before I’m airborne, bearing down on him with a Ryu-Tsui-Sen. I know his right thumb is already paralyzed, an injury that has forced him to adopt a left-handed style. Even with his wrong hand though, he is deadly. I cannot afford to be merciful; destroying his life as a swordsman is the only way to end his threat. I alter my attack to strike his raised left hand, and I feel the bones shatter under my dull blade as I drive his hand to the floor along with the rest of his body, breaking the floorboards and sending up a cloud of dust and wood fragments. Sometimes, I’m still a little awed and frightened at the power of Hiten Mitsurugi Ryu, and I’m not nearly as strong as my master. Gohei lays face-down in a shallow crater in the floor, completely immobile. Behind him sits Kaoru, mouth hanging open in a silent “Wow.” I spare her only a brief glance before turning to Gohei. He’s groaning a little, so I know he hears me. In truth though, my words are for Kaoru. “I have no attachments or regrets to the name Battousai, but even so I can’t give it away to someone like you. Of course, with those fingers you’ll never be able to swing a sword again.” I re-sheathe my sword with a louder-than-necessary *click* to emphasize the point, my gaze coming to rest on the only one of Gohei’s goons still conscious. He freezes under my gaze with a whimper. What a coward. I’m not even *trying* to be intimidating now. “Go get the police. Now. Understand?” He takes off at a run, leaving Kaoru and I alone. I’m not sure what to say to her, except to apologize for hiding my identity. “I didn’t want to tell you if it wasn’t necessary,” I add, trying not to sound defensive. After all, it’s not as if she’s some random woman; her recent problems stemmed from me directly, or rather my bloody name. Of anyone she had the most right to know; I shouldn’t have kept it from her. She continues to stare at me, though her expression is no longer awed or frightened. It isn’t angry either, though I would have expected it to be. Instead she is…thoughtful. I shift awkwardly under her silent gaze. “Um…well, take care.” Could I possibly sound more idiotic? Unable to bear the tension any longer I turn to leave, feeling her eyes boring in to my back. “BAKA!” “Oro!!” I can’t help it, the word just slips out. That’s not quite the reaction I’d expected from her…I turn around to find her standing, struggling to find words for what she wants to say. Something seems to pass between us then, a strange feeling of…connection? How does she do these things to me? “Can’t you help me a little? I told you I don’t care about other people’s pasts, and I can’t rebuild my school by myself!” She’s right; I hate to think so, but she really can’t do this alone. The state of her dojo, the fact that her last three students were driven out so easily, showing minimal loyalty to her and her style…she’s failing, slowly but surely. And yet…oh Kaoru you couldn’t possibly want *my* help; you don’t know what you’re asking. “But your school’s name…it would all be for naught if the real Battousai stayed here!” You say you don’t care who I am, but how could you *not*? I think I would, in your place. I don’t understand… “I didn’t say I wanted Battousai to stay! I wanted the Rur—“ a look of alarm passes over her face and she blushes suddenly, whirling around to face away from me. Oro? What on earth was that just now? “If…if you must leave, at least tell me your name. Your real name, not that of the hitokiri.” This time, I’m glad to supply it. She’s more than earned it. “Himura. Himura Kenshin.” She whispers my name back to me, and there is a strange note to her voice that gives me pause. She’s so hard to read, this brave young woman. She somewhat haughtily gives me permission to go, and I almost do…but something stops me. For reasons I don’t quite understand, I don’t want to walk out that dojo door. The neglect in her home, her loneliness, the fact that she now has no students and thus no income… Her deep blue eyes and bright, spirited voice, another part of me adds unexpectedly. No…no I can’t possibly have thoughts like those about her. She…she’s innocent, and I’m not. It couldn’t be that I…ah, I can’t understand myself! I grip the doorframe, ready to step out and leave. But she needs help… She’s asked me to stay. She doesn’t care who I am. She really doesn’t; to her, I’m just Kenshin, the friendly Rurouni. Maybe, maybe it wouldn’t be so bad to stay for awhile, at least until her dojo is up and running again… My heart makes the decision for me and almost without thought I slide the door shut with a sharp *snap*. I hear her sigh gently in disappointment. She thinks I’ve left; well, maybe I can make that lovely smile appear again. “I…I am a little tired of wandering, actually. So if you wouldn’t mind, could I…?” The look of shy delight on her face as she turns around drives away any regrets or second thoughts I may have had, and I feel my long-neglected sense of purpose stir again. I walk forward to meet her, my heart warm for the first time since I can remember. It feels so good to be needed, and to finally choose a direction instead of just drifting with a Rurouni’s random current. I will make sure there are no regrets this time, and that no more shadows from my past come to haunt her. I hope I have chosen right, Shishou. ~*~ On to part 3… Notes: If I haven’t slammed you over the head enough with it in this chapter already, yes I’m a big K&K fan, and proud of it ^_^ This chapter out of necessity had to come mostly from the episode. I thought about leaving the Gohei fight out, but I decided that the fic really needed it for content and as a bridge to the next part, so hopefully I did it justice.