Subject: [kffdisc] The Samurai Who Shagged Me, version 2 Date: Fri, 11 Jun 1999 23:54:17 -0400 From: Dee Baptista Reply-To: kffdisc@onelist.com To: kffdisc@onelist.com From: Dee Baptista Yup, that's right, I came back from seeing Austin Powers a couple of hours ago. So now, you get to experience the craziness that is Dee's horrific writing. This is only the first part of many, and my muse just quit on me, so I couldn't get to K&K yet, so I'll prolly get that part out tomorrow. Anyway, C&C is always welcome. Be as harsh with the criticism as you can, I know it needs work. No spoilers for anything they didn't already show in the commercials yet, but there may be slight spoilers for Memory/Revenge. In the year 1879, Himura Kenshin defeated Yukishiro Enishi and his plans for jinchuu. Enishi then went and froze himself so that he may return and carry out his plans for revenge through world domination at another time. One hundred twenty years later, Enishi was accidentally found and thawed out. Enishi wasted no time in contacting the Shanghai mafia for assistance in his plans for world domination. Many law enforcement organizations from around the world, including the CIA, were called in to stop Yukishiro's operations. They all have failed. A laboratory in Cornell University finally invented a time machine. The CIA wasted no time in using this device to go back in time to retrieve the one man who had defeated Yukishiro Enishi. They went back to Meiji 12 to get the man formerly known as the Hitokiri Battousai, Himura Kenshin, but there was a catch. His live-in girlfriend, Kamiya Kaoru, insisted that she come along, to make sure that he returned to their firends at the Kamiya Dojo in their own time. And so begins the story of.... Rurouni Kenshin, the Samurai who Shagged Me At Enishi's base: "Yukishiro-sama, many things have happened since you were frozen, " Takahashi explained. "We were able to get a hold of some of Tomoe's genetic data. With it, we created a clone of your sister. She is exactly like Tomoe, only one-eighth her size." Enishi pushed his spectacles farther up his nose with his index finger (a la Gendou), while pondering the little girl in front of him. Suddenly, a maniacal grin broke across his face. "She's wonderful!" he exclaimed, "Just like nee-san! In fact, I'll name her... Chibi-nee. We can use her to exact revenge on the Battousai's hellish spawn! Everybody, laugh with me!" Silence. Enishi got quite ticked off by the lack of enthusiasm, and started to roar. "What? You won't laugh with me? Then fine, take this!" With that, he took out a bazooka and started taking out his minions.