Date: Wed Apr 12, 2000 1:59pm  
Subject: Anneke-chan's Kenshin Horror - Part 2  


Title: Kenshin Horror!
Author:  Anneke-chan

Spoilers:  I don't know, but most likely for all the
Manga and Anime.
Type: Comedy/Cross Over/Parody . INSANITY!

Disclaimer:  Sorry, I had to do this.  Sorry you have
to read this.  Have fun. 

(Perenthesis show action that occurs on the stage. 
There won't be to much.)
{Brackets are lines the audience would yell}
The rest is the characters talking.  

Current Cast:  Lips (Tomoe).  


Part 2 - The Beginning of the adventure:  Damn it
Ugly!


Shishio-gumi:  Here they come!
(Honzo Kamatari & Otowa Hyouko run out of the church. 
They have just gotten married.  Kamatari is in a white
wedding dress, Hyouko in a tuxedo.)

Photographer(Played by Kaariwa Hennya):  Let's get a
picture. Close together now.
(Flash of the Camera)

Ralph (played by Otowa Hyouko): I guess we finally did
it, huh

Brad (played by Yahiko):  I don't think there's any
doubt about that. You and Kamatari
                have been almost inseparable since you
met in bishounen's character section.

Ralph:  Well to tell you the truth, Yahiko, That's the
only reason I showed up in the first place

Betty (played by Kamatari) O.K. you guys, this is it.
(everyone screams)

(Kamatari throws the flowers, Janet catches them)

Janet (played by Kaoru):  I got it! I got it!

Ralph:  Hey little fella looks like it could be your
turn next, eh?
Brad: Who cares
Ralph:  well, so long, see you Yahiko.

Janet:  Oh Brat, wasn't it wonderful?                
{No!}
Wasn't Kamatari radiantly beautiful?
{No!}
I can't believe it. An hour ago he was just plain old
Kamatari,
{echo: plain old cross dresser.}
now he's Mrs. Kamatari Otowa.

Brad:  Yes Ugly, Hyouko is a lucky guy.
Janet:  Yes.
(Shishio and Yumi walk by)
Shishio: I always cry at weddings.
 { "And laugh at funerals"}
Brad  Everyone knows that Kamatari is a wonderful
little cook.
{Kaoru isn't!  or 
He learned from Shishio  or 
Shishio a hot cooker to.}

Janet  Yes.
Brad  Why Hyouko himself, he'll be up for a promotion
in a year or two.
{If Kenshin doesn't kill him first!}

Janet  Yes.

                                  Dammit Ugly

Brad  Hey Kaoru.
Janet  Yes Yahiko?
Brad  I've got something to say 
{ "Then say it, don't sing it !" }
Janet  Uh huh.
Brad  I really love the skillful way... you beat the
other girls... 
{ "With a shinai?" }
                to the bride's bouquet.  
{ "Oh, that too..." }

 Janet  Oh Yahiko!.

 Brad  The river was deep but I swam it
                The future is mine so I'll plan it. 
                So don't tell me to can it.
                I've one thing to say and that's
Dammit, Ugly, you can't cook.

                The meal was long but I ate it 
                There's a fire in my chest
                and you caused it. 
                I've one thing to say and that's
Dammit, Ugly, you can't cook.

(Kaoru is getting really mad at this point)

                Here's a cook book to prove that I'm
no joker.
                There's only three ways that rice can
cook.
{That's Done Right, Done Wrong, and Done Kaoru's way)
                Oh K-A-O-R-U
                I hate you so.

(Kaoru less angry grabs the cook book)
Janet  Oh, it's nicer than Kenshin had
                Now we're enraged and I'm so glad
                That you have no Mom or Dad.
                I've one thing to say and that's Brat,
I'm mad, at you too.
                Oh Brat...

(Kaoru and Yahiko face off with shinai)

          Brad  Oh... dammit. 
         Janet  I'm mad...  
          Brad  Oh... Ugly. 
(Kaoru baps Yahiko)
         Janet  ...for you.          Brat I hate you
too.
  Brad & Janet  There's one thing left to do - ah -
oo.

  Brad:  And that's go see the man who began it.
{Yeah Watsuki}

                When we met on a bridge in Tokyo
                Made me give you the money back and
then panic 
                Now I've one thing to say and that's
Dammit, Ugly, you can't cook.
                Dammit, Kaoru.

(They fight back and forth)

         Janet  Oh Brat, I'm mad.
          Brad  Dammit, Ugly.

  Brad & Janet  I hate you.

(Both fall down exhausted.  The scene changes over to
a dark room.)

Narrator (Played by Aoshi): I would like, ah, if I
may,...to take you
                on a strange journey 

                It seemed a fairly ordinary night when
Yahiko and his Sensei Kaoru
                two young, normal  healthy kids, left
Tokyo
                that late May 13th  evening, to visit
a Himura Kenshin, ex-Battousai, now friend to both of
them.
                It's true there were dark storm
clouds. toward which they were driving.

Which sounds like a perfect night for me.  

Offstage someone yells: Get back to the script!

Narrator/Aoshi:  It was a night out  they were going
to remember... 
                for a very long time.