(The future isn't what it used to be....)
 

"MYSTERY SCIENCE THEATER 6.7"  (SEASON TWO)

EPISODE 12: VIRGIN WARRIOR SAILOR MOON

(A Sailor Moon Lemon MSTing)

MSTed From the Desk of Megane 6.7

This is a MSTing of a work of fiction created by another author.
Use of copyrighted and trademarked material is for entertainment
purposes only; no infringement on the original copyrights or
trademarks held by Best Brains, Inc. is intended or should be inferred.

Any random mention of certain anime characters, song titles, etc. are
the property of their respected creators/distributors/etc.  Just covering
my own ass here folks....

"Sailor Moon" is the property of Naoko Takeuchi and all the
distributors of her work.
 
"Virgin Warrior Sailor Moon" is the property of Umino and he's welcome
to it.  I do not intend to offend him for making fun of his work like this
but I figure it's only a matter of time before someone does.  Think of this
as another form of C&C.  ;)

(Note: The original unMSTed version of "Virgin Warrior" can be found at
"A Sailor Moon Romance".  See link at the end of the MSTing.)

Warning:  This fic contains mature content, both lemon and otherwise.
If you are offended by such material, simply delete it and it's gone.  If
not, enjoy!
 

A SHUTTLEBAY....
16:15 HOURS
 

 The mood of the room was solemn as Crow T. Robot and
Tom Servo, both clad in identical blue jumpsuits, stood side by side at
attention.  In front of them was a long black coffin with a small plush toy
of Artemis sitting atop and the words RIP  There was also a bronze
plaque that had the following words inscribed:

         *IN MEMORIUM*
 
                 *OSCAR "a.k.a." ARTEMIS'S LOVER*
 
                       *1996-1998*

 On the side of the coffin, there was a small sign with tiny printing
that read.....

      *If you can read this, you don't need laser eye surgery....*
 
 As the first few notes of a haunting MIDI tune were heard, Joel
Robinson approached the podium set up for this occasion and faced his robot
creations.  Taking a deep breath to steel himself against the conflicting
emotions tearing at his soul, Joel began his eulogy....

 "We are gathered here today to say good-bye to the *original*
hermaphrodite of fanfiction, Oscar.  Perhaps Rikmach said it best when
he said this of Oscar's passing....

 *Oscar and his stories are to Internet MiSTings as Torgo and "Manos"
was to the TV show. Oscar and his stories will live on Possibly as characters,
such as Torgo did, or simply as references of horror, which I have seen many.
Oscar will always be there as the prime example of the worst fanfiction could
ever possibly be....*

 Joel paused for a moment to gather himself, trying very hard to hold
his emotions in check.  "And although Oscar may no longer be with us, we
will remember his works for a long time to come and we will continue to MST
bad fanfiction in his memory...."

 As the MIDI swelled to a high-pitched crescendo, Joel pushed the
button that activated the single engine at the back of the coffin.  It gently
pushed its way forward towards the open shuttlebay doors and into the vast
regions of the final frontier... Space.

 "Magic Voice... Prepare the gun salute...."

 Magic Voice's seemed to be quivering a bit as she replied.
"A-Affirmative."  A moment later, two BFG 9000's appeared in front of
Joel and Crow.  The third materialized with a special attachment for Tom
to carry it.  Then Joel and Crow quietly picked up their respective BFG's
and walked towards the edge of the shuttlebay, Tom hovering beside them.

 "Gentlemen... Let's give Oscar a proper send off."

 "READY...."

 "AIM...."

 "WASTE HIM!!!"

 The trio fired their BFG's simultaneously at Oscar's coffin.  A
moment later, it exploded in a blaze of glory, leaving behind a Star Wars
Special Edition-esque shockwave that shot out from all sides.  Joel and
the bots all celebrated while a rousing MIDI chorus of  "Alleluia!" played
over the speakers, drowning out the hissing sound of another door opening.
So caught up in their celebration, they failed to notice a human dressed in a
maroon jumpsuit enter and quietly begin to fiddle with a computer panel
nearby....

 "So, shall we do it again?"  Tom inquired to Crow.

 "Nah, we've already used the BFG 9000.  How about the railgun?"
Crow suggested.

 "We've used that already too!"  Tom reminded him.

 "Ok, uh, what do you suggest?"  Crow said as he turned towards
Joel..

    "Well...."  Joel considered it for a moment.  "How about instead of
blowing up Oscar, we do something like this...."

 Joel suddenly lunged forward, grabbing Tom and Crow in each of
his hands and flung them both out the airlock and towards the open reaches
of space.  Their startled cries for help quickly changed into screams of terror
as Joel began blasting away at them with his BFG.  As the lethal green spheres
impacted, they reduced the two robots to scattered atoms, forever to drift in
space....

 "End program, Magic Voice."  A human voice rang out.  The
shuttlebay suddenly faded away to the balsa wood walls of the Holocabana.
The Joel with the BFG also vanished while the real Joel walked over to his
robot companions who lay on the floor in a dazed heap.

 "I thought I told you guys to clean out the loadpan...."  Joel
admonished as Crow stumbled to his feet while Tom used his hoverskirt to
turn upright.

 "Spoilsport...."  Crow muttered.

 "That was a dirty trick Joel!  Programming our Joel to kill us...."
Tom added.

 "What do you call programming my likeness as a sadist that shoots
various weapons at people's coffins?"  Joel retorted.

 "But you said you hated Oscar in the last MSTing!"  Crow pointed out.

 Joel bigsweated.  "Uh well... I was under a lot of pressure to keep you
guys in line and I may have said something out of frustration....."

 "Just admit it, Joel.  You couldn't stomach his fanfic either!  Especially
after Oscar threw aside his devotion to Artemis to sleep with Felicia and then
kill a bunch of dogs to hide the truth!"  Tom accused.

 Joel desperately tried to think of an excuse only to be saved as red
lights began flashing in the holocabana.  A moment later, Gypsy's voice
rang out over the intercom.
 
 "Joel, it's the Mads...."

 "Really?  I thought it was another *bogus* virus warning...."  Tom
replied sarcastically.
 
 "Let's get this over with...."  Crow muttered.
 

* * *
 

DEEP 13

 
 Dr. Clayton Forrester turned towards the viewscreen as TV's
Frank summoned the SOL crew.  A few moments later, the trio appeared
on the screen.

 "Afternoon, sirs."  Joel said in greeting.  "Ready for the invention
exchange?"

 Dr. Forrester sneered in Joel's direction before replying.  "Show
us what you got, pinkboy!"

 Joel shrugged and gestured at the counter where his invention
was already set up and waiting.  Frank instantly recognized it and
exclaimed  "Hey!  I used to have one of those too!  Then Dr. F used it
in a experiment with a Giga-Hellbeast...."

 "Oh, suck it in, Frank!"  Dr. Forrester snarled before returning his
attention to the screen.  "Continue, Joel...."

 Joel did so.  "One of the hottest fads out there right now, besides
listening to the "Titanic" Soundtrack and sobbing with your friends, is the
Giga-pet."  Joel reached into his pocket and produced one that had a
digital SD godzilla inside.

 "Small, cute and fun, these little guys can provide hours of
enjoyment.  But like a real pet, it needs a lot of tender love and caring and
it can be a bit of a nuisance when you have a hot date, exam to study for, on
vacation, or just want to nap."

 "Now, thanks to this...."  Joel gestured to his invention, a small
ram chip with a clip on the back.  "You'll never have to worry about your
giga-pet getting sick or dying on you if you leave it alone for a long period
of  time.  This little device hooks up to your giga-pet...."  Joel clipped the
chip to the giga-pet.  "And instantly creates a shelter that feeds and takes
care of him while you take care of your business."  Joel finished.

 "It's the ultimate in slothfulness!"  Crow added.

 "What do you think, sirs?"  Joel inquired.

 "Cute, Joel... Literally."  Dr. F replied sardonically.  "Now my
invention is intended to honor the one man that your two little friends
take such joy in destroying over and over again...."

 Tom and Crow stared at the floor while Joel remained silent.

 "Yes, in honor of Oscar, I've created a special virus that
specifically infects word-processing programs.  Once in place, anytime
the user tries to bring up or create a document to work on, the virus will
randomly replace words with Oscar-isms.

 "A what?!?"  Joel and the bots chorused.
 
 "An Oscar-ism."  Dr. Forrester repeated with an evil grin.  "Words
like *cause* replaced with *cuz*, *though* with *tough*, *put* with
*putted*, *tennis shoes* with *tennis*...."

 "*In* instead of *On*!"  Frank couldn't resist adding.

 "Yes, and let's not forget the most bizarre one of all....*FROGNED*!!!
BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!"  Dr. Forrester erupted into gales of mad
laughter."
 
 "I have to admit, Dr. F, that's a pretty unique way to remember
someone, all right...."   Joel replied.

 "Oh, but it gets even better, Joel!"  Dr. Forrester continued.  "Guess
what happens if the reader tries to write a lemon while the virus is in effect?"
 
 The trio gasped.  "You... You don't mean....!"  Tom stammered.

 "Oh, but I do."  Dr. Forrester continued in a cold whisper.
"Imagine your favorite SM lemon with the senshi becoming felines and
Oscar...."

 "Okay!  Okay!  We get the idea!  Yecch...."  Crow exclaimed in
disgust.

 "You're one evil mamajama, Dr. F...."  Joel said as he shook his
head in dismay.

 "Yes, I am, aren't I?"  Dr. Forrester smiled.  "Anyhoo, your
experiment this week is another depraved Sailor Moon lemon.  While it's
not quite up to Oscar-caliber, it should put your stomachs in the spin cycle
for a good long while...."

 "Mine's still in rinse from the last lemon...."  Crow muttered under
his breath.

 "'Virgin Warrior Sailor Moon' by Umino.  Love it if you can, hate it
if you must, but always cringe.  Send them some suffering, Frank...."

 "It'll absolutely, positively, be there in a jiffy, Dr. F!"  Frank replied
with his best suck up tone of voice.
 

* * *
 

SATELLITE OF LOVE
 

  As the image of the mad scientists winked out, the bots let out
a collective groan.  Joel forced himself not to groan with them as he
exclaimed.  "Come on guys, Dr. F said this one's not as bad as the last
one, and we made it through that okay...."

 "Yeah, I'm sure Dr. F has our best interests in mind...."  Tom
retorted sarcastically.

 "I dunno Joel...."  Crow added in a strange voice.  "I get the feeling
this is going to be a rough one either way...."

 Before Joel could deliver more of his optimistic pep-talk, alarms
and sirens suddenly rang out.

 
 "OHHHH, WE'VE GOT LEMON SIGN!!!"  Joel cried out.
 

(Door 6: It's a solid stone wall with yellow markings.  You connect the
dots with a yellow crayon to form an ankh and a doorway mysteriously
appears.)

(Door 5: It's cut across the middle.  You open the bottom half and
discover it's a fridge.  You grab a quick snack and then ask a neighbor
to help move it.

(Door 4: It's made of cotton.  You throw some hot water on it.  After
it shrinks, you easily squeeze past.)

(Door 3: It's made of solid rock.  You cover it with a large sheet of paper and
it vanishes.)

(Door 2. It's a brick wall.  You place a veiled screen in front of it and
some suspenseful music plays as you appear to *magically* walk on through
to the other side.)

(Door 1: It's a double door.  Both swirl open from the center.)

(Door .7: A beam of golden light erupts from the floor.  You walk into it.)
 

 Joel emerged from the light into the theater with Tom in his arms,
Crow emerging a moment later and following close behind.  Stepping over
the air grate that prevented Tom from entering the theater on his own, Joel
placed him down on one of the theater seats and sat next to him, Crow
sitting on his right.
 

>[Disclaimer: IF you are UNDERAGE, DON'T READ ANY MORE.  IF
>you live in locality where erotic material is illegal, DO NOT READ
>FURTHER.  Read this article at YOUR OWN RISK.  The Author
>assume no responsibility, obligation, liability, etc. etc. of the consequence
>of reading this work.
 

Tom: Hmmm... think the author's trying to tell us something?

Crow: <author>  This fic is so bad, even *I* can't recommend it!

Joel: The author will also not be held responsible for any wrist cramps
developed during the reading of this lemon....
 

>This story is copyright by the author.  Permission is grant for archive,
>distribution, and print out for personal use.  As long as this disclaimer
>and notice are included and the use is not of commercial nature.]
 

Crow: You mean the author actually bothered to *COPYRIGHT* this stuff?
 

>Notice:  This story is 100% DIC free.  All characters retain their name,
>gender, attacks, equipments, etc. from the original Japanese TV series.
 

Crow: That's a relief.  I hate to see characters in fanfiction make *DIC*s
out of themselves.

Tom: No DIC?  Must be a lesbian lemon....
 

>DIC brought a great work of art and is destroying it through bad editing,
>bad dubbing, bad scripting and unnecessary plot change.
 

Tom: Yeah, DIC really pissed all over it....

Crow: See DIC. See DIC dub. Don't be a DIC!
 

>The cowardly DIC even changed my favorite Dark Kingdom general, Zoisite,
>into female.  There are nothing wrong for him to love Kunzite(Malachite) as a
>male.
 

Joel: Yeah!  And how dare DIC change Rei's grandfather from a dirty
old lecher who secretly lusts for young girls into a kindly old man!

Crow: And the panty shots!  Women have the right to show off their
panties like anyone else.  How DARE they edit those out!

Tom: Not to mention the breast outlines during the senshi's transformations!
Why I oughtta....!
 

>I don't care what those so-called Family Value groups or PTA says,
>but the notion that animation is only for kids is outdated.
 

Tom: Unless they're Toys-R-Us kids.

Crow: Silly Author!  Animation is for adults!
 

>And they are wrong for children to be exposed to true love such as this.
>This move had essentially ruined the artistic integrity of the show.
 

Joel: <author>  And that's why I've written this lemon, to bring some
dignity and poise back to the Sailor Moon series!
 

>The choice of voice actor is also laughable.  Terri Hawkes is nothing
>compared to the magnificent Mitsuishi Kitono.  Comparing Japanese
>Sailor Moon and North America(Except the lucky people of Quebec
>who got the superior French version)
 

Tom: Actually, Canadians dubbed the voices of the English version as
well, if I'm not mistaken....

Crow: Besides, the Japanese Usagi is a ditz and so's the American
version.  What's Umino complaining about?  The quality of the
whining?

Joel: I think he's just mad because he can't see any panty shots.
 

>Sailor Moon is like comparing Jean Luc Picard and Locust-the-Borg.
 

Crow: Locust?  Umino's really starting to bug me....

Tom: About time the Borg assimilated something other than humanoids.

Joel: Actually, the Borg are a lot like Locusts if you think about it....
 

>They may look alike.  They may even composed of same  material.  But
>one is assimilated by the evil mass culture.
 

Crow: Something tells me this guy posts a lot of messages about U.F.O's
and government conspiracies....

Tom: And who's Umino to diss Jean-Luc?

Joel: Yeah, even when he *WAS* assimilated, he was still cool.  Not as
cool as Seven of Nine, mind you....

Tom: *Cool* isn't the word I'd use to describe her.
 

>If you agree with me, please write to DIC, its owner
>Capitol City/ABC, and the future owner Disney.
 

Tom: <author> If you disagree with me, then piss off!

Crow: Hey, I'm too busy preparing my hate letter for Disney when they
make the *live action* version of Sailor Moon....

Joel: You think it's going to suck, huh?

Tom: Oh no... I'm sure it will remain as true and faithful to the original
animated series as the live-action version of *Street Fighter* did for the
video game....

Joel: Ouch.
 

>The DIC had sunk so low I won't use the names they made up.(Amy
>Anderson, as if.
 

Tom: Yeah, what a DIC!

Crow: The DIC had sunk so low because it had trouble finding the....

Joel: <grabs Crow and Tom in a double headlock>  Guys, can you stop
the DIC jokes now, please?
 

>She would always be Mizuno Ami to me.)
 

All: <singing> You are so beautiful... to me....
 

>But anyone who had watched more than 10 epsoides of North America
>version should be able to identify the characters.  If you can't, tough.
 

Joel: Boy, this author really cares about his readers, doesn't he?

Tom: <author> If you can't understand this fic, it's *YOUR* fault for
living in an area that doesn't carry the imports!
 

>True fans buy imported Japanese laser disc set, only wanna-be watch the
>DIC  blasphemy.
 

Tom: <author>  Save Our Sailors Campaign... From Hades heart, I stab
at thee!  For hate's sake, I spit my last breath at thee!

Joel: What is this?  A fanfic or a sermon?

Crow: Umino *IS* Reverend Moon!
 

>The Shinto rituals depicted here are plot devices.  They do not
>necessary reflect the true practice of Shinto.  As proper in Japanese, I
>placed their surname before given name.  Bishoujo=Pretty Young Girl.
>Bishojo(without u)=Pretty Female Virgin.  Senshi=fighter.
 

Tom: Virgin Warrior=Crappy lemon

Crow: Author=Crybaby

Joel: President Clinton=Horny Bugger
 

>"Sailor Moon"  and the characters are copyrighted by
>Naoko Takeuchi, Kodansha, TV Asahi, Toei Animation.
 

Tom: Wow, the author won't even acknowledge the temporary copyright
DIC has with Sailor Moon....

Crow: Yeah, what a DIC!

Joel: Crow!

Crow: Sorry, last one, I promise!
 

>Used here without permission as fair use parody.
 

Crow: Yeah, just like this MSTing.

Tom: Freedom of expression... Gotta love it!
 

>If you are really into story continuity, I would place this story at
>around Japanese epsoides 65 to 69.  No, Chibi-Usa is not involved.  She
>is too old for me at the age of 900.
 

Joel: Cologne has to be pissed about that.  She's 600 years younger and
she looks like a old prune....
 

>But I am planning to write about the Dark Lady and Mamoru, Zoisite
>and Mamoru, Fish Eye and Mamoru, Artemis and Luna, Shingo and
>Luna, etc.
 

Joel: And that's just during the first lemon scene!

Tom: Fish Eye and Mamoru?

Crow: Oh Cod... First the author bores us with his Tails of Roe and now
he's trying to gross us out....

Tom: Yeah, and what really makes me Eel is when people Carp and
Whale just for the Halibut, with no real Porpoise!

Crow: He's Net that kind of Buoy, Sea... He's trying to make us rise to the
Bait and we're falling for it, Hook, Line and Sinker!

Joel: I'm Shored getting tired of these puns....
 

>BISHOJO SENSHI SAILOR MOON

>Virgin Warrior Sailor Moon
 

Tom: VIRGIN WARRIOR!  She protects helpless virgins from being
thrown into volcanoes, sacrificed on stone altars and being used in
tentacle horror films!

Crow: Soon to be a major motion picture with Tori Spelling!

Joel: Uh, I think you're a little too late for that....
 

>Warrior of Lust and Juice
 

Joel: Hey, when you got a lemon... You make lemonade.

Tom: How apropos....
 

>By Umino(I am not Melvin. I am not surfing the Internet.)
 

Crow: <Umino> I am not a fanfic writer!  I am a hypocritical boob!

Joel: I don't know about you, but this author is making the real Umino look
pretty bad....

Tom: That's an accomplishment in itself.
 

>"That brat Chibi-Usa did it AGAIN." cries Tsukino Usagi, 14 years old.
>Her room wasn't really messy, but it didn't looks right.
 

Tom: <Usagi> Somebody's been straightening up my bed!

Crow: Yeah, why aren't there any sex toys lying around like in all
those other SM lemons!
 

> She twists her long blonde pony tails around her fingers.(So often, she
>had to explains. Since she is such an air-head, it even overcome the
>genetic and made her a Japanese blonde.)
 

Joel: Hm... if Usagi has to explain why she's blond, I wonder how much
trouble Ami will have explaining her hair color....
 

>Somebody had tampered the room. The drawers were half
>open and the closet was unlatched. It must be Chibi-Usa, the girl who
>fall out of the sky,
 

Tom: <Chicken Little> The brat is falling!  The brat is falling!

Crow: I didn't know Chibi-Usa lived on Mount Olympus?
 

>searchs for the Silver Crystal. A black cat entered the room.
 

Joel: <Serena> Hey Felicia!  How're you and Spidey doing?
 

>She tilt her head up and began to inquire "What's wrong this time?
>Did you flunk another test again?" Usagi was furious, "No, well, I did.
>But that's not the reason I am angary.
 

Tom: <Usagi>  I'm *angary* that the author didn't spellcheck this thing
before sending it out!
 

>Some people had mess around with my stuff. Chibi-Usa most did it again.
>Didn't I told you to watch my room while I am in school? Where had you
>been?"
 

Joel: For someone who so picky about DIC, this fanfic sure sounds dubbed to
me....

Crow: <black cat>  Meow, Meow Meow?  (Translation: Why blame me,
I'm just an ordinary black cat!
 

>Luna hangs her head low,
 

Crow: I stand corrected.
 

>seems to hiding the crescent mark on her forehead, "I went to Minako's
>place.
 

All: <hums the theme to Melrose's Place>
 

>There were some stuff I need to discuss with Artemis.
 

Joel: <Luna> So how does it feel to be free from Oscar?

Crow: <Artemis> Great!  Minako and I are back together and
I swore I would never stray from her again!

Joel: <groans>
 

>Chibi-Usa went to the apartment of Chiba Mamoru to do homework. I
>saw them together on my way back."  "I knew it! Mamoru had dumped
>me so he can sleep with that young tramp.
 

All:  WHAT?!?!

Tom: Yep, this Sailor Moon fanfic is *MUCH* closer to the original
series than DIC's version....

Crow: Shouldn't that be *old tramp*?  Chibi-Usa IS 900 years old, after all.
 

>And I should had let Minako neut that damn Artemis.
 

Tom: Neut?

Crow: Ripley?
 

>If you two weren't fooling around, my room should be safe." Usagi
>griped.
 

Crow: I'm completely lost....

Tom: Well, here's what I get from the plot so far... Usagi discovers her
room slightly messed up and she bitches about it.  Then Luna walks in
and tells Usagi that she saw Chibi-Usa at Mamoru's apartment doing
homework.  Usagi jumps to the rather abrupt and bizarre conclusion
that Mamoru is sleeping with Chibi-Usa, yet instead of completely
freaking out, she bitches at Luna for not protecting her room....

Joel: You know guys, I'm starting to miss Oscar already.
 

>Suddenly, she senses the sound of footsteps. She quickly went
>silent and turn around, slaping her long pony tails into her own face.
 

Joel: Gruesome!

Tom: Tsukino Usagi, 14, stabbed in the face with her own hair....

Crow: Kinda gives new meaning to the term "*HAIRY* Kari"....
 

>She looks to the door, and saw her younger brother, Shingo, standing
>in the doorway.
 

Tom: <Usagi> What are you doing there?

Crow: <Shingo> Hey, you never know when an earthquake may strike.
 

>"Sis, are you talking to your cat again? Don't you know that's an
>early symptom of mental illness?" Shingo says casually and walks away.
 

Crow: <Shingo> It's just one step away from talking to yourself.
Isn't that right, Shingo?

Joel: If talking to your cat is a symptom of mental illness, then Oscar
must have really been nuts!
 

>Usagi was going to yell at him, but she suddenly caught a glimpse of
>pink and white color flash out from his pant pocket.
 

Tom: Shingo was wearing a condom and his zipper wasn't up?

Joel: That's an image I don't want to carry about with me....
 

> She immediately went to the drawer and confirmed her suspicion.  Her
>favorite pink and white panty was missing.
 

Joel: The one with feathers and pearls?

Crow: The one with leather and lace?

Tom: The one that's edible?

Crow: <Usagi>  Drat!  I was going to wear that to Lita's tonight!
 

>In a very rare occasion, Usagi made an logical evaluation.
 

Joel: Unfortunately, this wasn't one of them.
 

>A sly smile surfaced on her face. Now she finally had a chance to get even
>with her brat little brother. She took out her Sailor Senshi communicator and
>began consulting with her friends. er brother is going to get a big
>surprise.
 

Crow: <Cockneyed accent> Eah, er brover what stole 'er panty is
gonna get 'imself a big surpise from 'er and 'er friends.
 

>After all, she is not an ordinary teenager girl. She is the
>Pretty Soldier Sailor Moon, the warrior of love and Justice.
 

Crow: I thought it was love and juice?

Tom: I thought it was Virgin Warrior?

Joel: Boy, it's a good thing DIC isn't dubbing this MSTing, or we'd
have even MORE inconsistencies!
 

>In the name of the Moon, she is going to punish Shingo.
 

Joel: Never mind the fact that Youma are roaming the streets and
Tokyo needs saving....

Crow: And crime is rampant and the Yakuza run the country....

Tom: And the court systems are a joke and lawyers free guilty men....
 

>When everything settled, she walked to family room. Shingo was playing
>the "Sailor V" video game. Usagi can't help but smile when she caught
>another glimpse of her panty from Shingo's pocket.
 

Joel: <Usagi> Aww... He's so kawaii when he's being a pervert.
 

>"Shingo, I just got a call from Rei from the shrine. Someone made a big
>offering today. They won't be able to eat all of it by themself. Let's go and
>help them out."
 

Tom: <Usagi>  We're going bar-hopping to blow the extra cash.
 

>Shingo considers the situation for a while and says "OK, let me go to my
>room and change." "No, no, your clothes is perfectly fine. Let's go
>NOW."
 

Crow: After all, he won't be wearing them for long....

Joel: Crow....

Crow: Come on, Joel!  Do you really think at this point that there's
the slightest chance that Shingo won't be seduced by his sister and her
friends?  It's a lemon for pete's sake!

Joel: I guess you have a point there.
 

>Usagi drags her unenthusiastic brother to the Hikawa shrine.  They
>went to Rei's room directly.
 

Tom: Heh.  I'll bet he's enthusiastic now!
 

>Shingo glances around the room and saw nothing resemble foods .
 

Crow: <Shingo> Unless I count Rei's creamy thighs, luscious lips and
dripping honey....
 

>"Where are the foods?" "Shingo, it's impolite to ask those kind of
>question.
 

Tom: Yeah, Shingo!  Mind your *grammers*!

Crow: <Shingo>  Rub a dub dub, where's my damn grub!
 

>Ah!
 

Joel: <Kunou>  ...my goddess in pigtails?

Crow and Tom: It's Megami-Sama....

Joel: Oh, bite me!
 

>I can really use some foods.  But that can wait until we settle the more
>important things.  Rei, is your grandpa around?"
 

Tom: <Rei>  I think he said something about getting out of this lemon
while the getting was good....
 

>Hino Rei, as beautiful as ever with her long ravenous dark hair, dress in her
>usual red and white Miko(Shinto priestess) dress, replies "Of course not,
 

Joel: <Rei>  Yeah, he and Chad went boozing hours ago with the
*extra offerings.*
 

>I wouldn't had agreed to this if that dirty old man is around. He is going
>to be fasting for the next three days."
 

Tom: <Rei> And when he's done, I, for one, am going to be out of the
country where it's safe!
 

>Silently, Aino Minako, another pretty blonde, enters the entrance and
>closes the door.
 

Crow: Hmm... she must be a dumb blonde if she closes the door while
standing *in* the entrance....

Joel: <Minako> Ouch, my nose!

Crow: Too bad it wasn't Makoto or the door would have bounced off
something else....

Tom: Heh.
 

>"I have closed all the entrance to the shrine. Nobody will bother us. Now
>we can deal with this naughty young boy."
 

Crow: <Dr. Forrester>  I'm a naughty boy!  Naughty! Naughty! Naughty!

Joel: Crow, I told you before never to imitate Dr. Forrester!  You guys
sound so much alike, it's scary....
 

>Shingo starts to panic. His sister had always been strange and weird.
 

Crow: But, let's face it, anyone who changes into a sailor girl with
magical powers has to be a *little* strange and weird....
 

>From time to time, he had been ashamed of her stupidity.  And since she
>adopted that strange black cat, she had acted more eccentric from time to
>time.
 

Crow: <ominous> Ever since that Black Day....
 

>Now he was caught stealing her panty, she even told her beautiful
>friends. Shingo slips his hand into his pocket,
 

Tom:  Smooth move, Houdini!  They'll NEVER think to look there!
 

>fist clenched around the panty, unsure about a proper response. Out of
>despair, he starts to run toward the entrance.
 

Crow: Bad move, Shingo.  Minako's still standing in the entrance,
remember?
 

>Shingo didn't run far before he hears some shouts.
 

All: <Singing> You make us want to SHOUT!  Kick our heels up and
SHOUT!  Throw our hands up and SHOUT....
 

>"Moon Crystal Power! Make up!"

>"Venus Star Power! Make up!"
 

Tom: Burt and Loni!  Make up!

Crow: Huh?

Tom: Sorry, couldn't resist.
 

>Shingo tries to turn his head back to see what's happening.  Unfortunately
>for him, he couldn't move anymore.
 

Tom: Shingo has died.  Do you wish to Restore, Restart or Quit?

Crow: Quit!  Definitely Quit!

Joel: Nice try, Crow.
 

>He heard "Venus Love Me Chain" and his body was restrained by a series
>of heart shaped illusions.
 

Crow: He's having a heart attack!

Joel: Either that or the fanfic's turned into an episode of the Care Bears.
 

>Unable to keep his balance, he falls down on the ground hard.
 

Tom: Shingo must have delicately rounded legs....
 

>He was drag back and positioned in front of the altar. He saw Rei
>standing in front of him while Sailor Moon and Sailor Venus is busy
>striping him.
 

Tom: She's turning him into a zebra?

Crow: Either that or a candy cane.

Joel: Considering the fic, I'd lean towards the latter.
 

>Sailor Moon takes the panty out of his pocket and sniffs it. "Yuck, what
>had you done with it."
 

Crow: <Shingo>What are you talking about?  YOU were the last one
wearing it!
 

>Rei steps up and giggles "Don't worry. Males are like that. I had caught
>my grandpa wearing my stuff, too.
 

All: Ewwwwwww!!!

Joel: Yet another mental image I could do without....
 

>In your brother's case, I think he may be possessed by some lecherous fox
>spirits.
 

Crow: Yeah, him and Rupert Murdoch!
 

>As a Shinto priestess, it's my duty to determined if he is possessed or just
>a healthy young boy." She took out a "akuryou taisan"(Begone! Evil Sprits)
>Ofuda(Ward) and gently places it on Shingo's chest.
 

Tom: Well, he's got the Ward, now all he needs is the Beaver!

Joel: <groans>
 

>Rei kneed in front of Shingo and began to mediate. Abruptly, she begins to
>chant "Rin, pyou, tou, sha, kai, jin, retsu, sai, zen. Akuryou taisan!"
 

All: <singing> Do, re, me, fa, so, la, ti, do!
 

>alone with the hand gestures.
 

Joel: She gave Shingo the fing-o?
 

>Fire erupts from the altar and envelops Shingo. Strangely, Shingo didn't
>feel heat, but a strange sensation.
 

Crow: A mysterious and frightening sensation known as... PAIN.

Joel:  <singing>  Touch... Burning Touch... Give me touch... Burning touch....
 

>It penetrates into his skin, probing, testing and stimulating EVERY parts
>of his body. It feels like tides of forces flow through his body, wash away
>the fifths.
 

Tom: <Yoda>  Use the forces, Shingo... Use the forces....

Crow: (singing>  Da-da-da-DA... da-da-da-*DA*....

Joel: What are you doing, Crow?

Crow: Paying tribute to the fifths that washed away.
 

>Except in one place. Shingo feel the force accumulates in
>his groin, building up the pressure and pleasure,
 

Tom: <Shingo>  Ohhh man, I knew I shouldn't have drank so much soda....
 

>until it erupted uncontrolablely.
 

Tom:  <Shingo>  Ahhhhhhhh....

Crow: It erupted uncontrolablolebleleey!
 

>Rei picks up some of the juice with her finger and tastes it. "Yummy!
>Your brother is not possessed. But we should perform the rites of
>purification on him more often. Some one, clean him up. Now, let me
>finish the cleansing with the holy water."
 

Tom: If's he's already clean, why cleanse him again?

Joel: And Umino has the nerve to call DIC's Sailor Moon, blasphemy?!?

Crow: Shinto is going to need a PR campaign just to undo the damage this
fanfic is doing!
 

>Rei drops her red skirt to the floor, as the customary, she does not
>wear panty under it.
 

Crow and Tom:  SCHWING!!!  SCHWING!!!

Joel: You guys....
 

>Shingo can hardly believe what he is witnessing.
 

Joel: We can hardly believe what we are reading.
 

>Rei lowers her crouch on top of Shingo's face.
 

Tom: ...forcing Shingo to raise his stretch.
 

>"Lick it, let the flow of the holy water cleanse you. Oh! YEAH! That's
>right, oh! no, over here. Yes, HARDER.  Don't stop. There are more to
>come, suck on it."
 

Crow: If he was just a few inches lower, he'd be licking holy mud...

Joel: CROW!

Tom: Uggh....
 

>At the same time, Sailor Venus begin to clean Shingo up with her tongue.
>After she gets every drops possible,
 

Crow: <Venus>  Good to the last drop!
 

>she put Shingo's penis into her mouth.  It's not big, just about a mouthful.
 

All: <groans>

Crow: Now *THAT* was a bad pun.
 

>She murmurs "It feels good, I hadn't get a chance to suck one of those since
>I returned from England.
 

Tom: Single-handedly causing twice as many scandals in the Royal Family.
 

>Artemis is good, but it's gross to have his hair in my mouth."
 

All: UUUGGHHHH!!!

Crow: Well, we *did* predict Artemis would go back to Minako.

Tom: <Minako>  I sure hope that hair was from Artemis....

Joel: Enough already, Tom!
 

>She holds Shingo with one hand, while using other hand on herself.
 

Crow: <singing> I wanna hold your hand... I wanna hold your hand....
 

>Usagi/Sailor Moon looks on the side, licking her lips. She is helping
>herself with the Moon Scepter.
 

Crow: Which end?

Joel: Crow!

Crow: What?  It's a legitimate question!
 

>"Hey, shouldn't you two left some of him for me to punish him. I am the
>one who caught him, you know."
 

Crow: If that's punishment, I'd love to see the reward....

Tom: <Shingo>  Damn it!  I've been stealing her panties for
years... Look what I've been missing all that time!  Bakabakabakabaka....
 

>Sailor Venus gives up Shingo's penis, clears her throat, "Yeah! You
>can help out. He is still soft.
 

Joel: <Minako>  And cuddly too!
 

>Let's use your "Moon Princess Halation" to make him hard again."
 

Crow: Let's not and say we didn't.

Tom: To think of all the impotent men out there who would kill for
that wand....

Crow: <Shingo> Anybody got any Viagra?
 

>"I am using it, damn it, it feels good to put it there, and I am not let it go,
 

Joel:  If she won't let it go, how could she love it?

Tom: Cute, Joel....
 

>Minako. Oooh, all those fanboys would never suspect where
>I hides all my jewels."
 

Tom: Yes, before DIC, Usagi *ALWAYS* talked like Popeye.

Crow: Oh, of course not. No one's has *EVER* thought that Usagi would
keep her scepter in there....
 

>"Hey, you two, cut that out. I got an idea." Rei speaks as she fondling her
>own breast.
 

Tom: <Shingo> Great idea!

Crow: <Shingo> Any more ideas, Rei?  Think real hard now….
 

>Usagi looks at her with bewilderment "You, what do you know?
>You, the one who must be pure to remain a Miko?"
 

Tom: Yeah, only the purest woman can become La Blue Girl.

 
>"That's why I learned so much from grandpa. Everyone can just fuck, but
>you would have to be clever in my position. Not that the concept of
>cleverness is possible for you, dimwit.
 

Tom: This is starting to sound like an episode of Black Adder.

Crow: <Baldrick> I have a cunning plan to get us out of reading this
lemon, sir.

Joel: <Blackadder>: Frankly, Baldrick,  you can take your cunning plan,
roll it up like a newspaper and shove it in a place that is arguably more
appealing than your face, and less odorous than your breath....

Crow: <Baldrick> Permission to scurry away in shame and self-loathing, sir?

Joel: <Blackadder> Permission granted.
 

>Hey, Shingo, just because I am talking doesn't mean you can stop.
 

Tom: <Usagi> Shingo?  Shingo!  Oh no!  He's dead!  Looks like he
suffocated to death….

Crow: But, what a way to go!
 

>Ooh! Yes, keep going. Usagi, do you still have the Luna
>Transformation Pen down there.
 

Tom: I thought she kept the Moon Scepter down there?

Crow: It that's true, she must keep the transformation pen in her….

Joel: <looks at Crow>

Crow: …boots.
 

>Ah! My Goddess!
 

Joel: IT'S MEGAMI-SAMA!!!   Hah!  Beat you guys to it!

Crow and Tom:  Bully for you.
 

>You got so many junks down there.
 

Tom: ...even Sanford and Son would be envious.

Joel: What about Jeff Rutsch?
 

>With its power, you can have your brother's ass.
 

Joel: Why would Usagi want Shingo's donkey?
 

>But before that, give your brother a little help. Yes, Shingo,
>that's a nice way to repay me."  Usagi takes her Moon Scepter out,
>with juice still dripping form it,
 

Tom: Papaya?

Joel: Orange?

Crow: Guava?
 

>she yelled "Moon Princess Halation" and draws a circle on air.  Music
>suddenly came out from no where
 

Crow: <singing>  The CIRCLE of LIFE!

Joel: <Usagi>  Wahhh!!!  I hate this fluff music!  I WANT NINE INCH
NAILS, DAMMIT!!!
 

>and Venus choked on Shingo's suddenly hardened penis. "Cough, cough,
>gosh. I know I asked for it. But next time, dimwit, can you please gimme
>a little early warning. People had died from this sort of things, you know."
 

Tom: People have died from *READING* this sort of thing!

Crow: Please wait until the erection has come to a complete stop before
sucking on it.  This public service message was brought to you by Cocks B.
Us.  Their motto: Try us with your breasts, we're the best!

Joel: <shakes his head>
 

>"Go back and suck him, you ungreatful brat. Turn him over. You can suck
>under him." Usagi picks up another one of her magic toy,
 

Crow: A dildo?

Tom: Handcuffs?

Crow: A paddle?

Tom: A fish?

Joel: A candle?

Tom and Crow: ???

Joel: If you can't admonish em, join em.
 

>the Luna Transformation Pen. "Moon Power! Transform me into a
>hermit.
 

Tom:  Oh my God!  Usagi's been transformed into the Unabomber!!

Crow: Given the situation, I'm not surprised.
 

>Oh! No!
 

Joel: <Usagi> I've turned into Peter Noone!
 

>It's wrong. What the word I was trying to say? That's it, thanks, Rei.
 

Tom:  <Rei>  Huh?  You talking to me?
 

>Moon power Transform me into a hermaphrodite."
 

Joel:  She's trying to resuscitate Oscar?!?

Crow: Oh my god!  It's an Oscarfic in disguise!

Tom: ARRRRRRRRRGHHHH!!!!   (Tom's head explodes with a flash
of pyrotechnics and a shower of sparks)

Joel: <sighs>  Not again....
 

>The power worked. Usagi looks down, giggles "Wow, it even bigger
>than Mamoru's.
 

Tom: <coughing> There's a real shocker.

Joel: You okay, Tommy?

Tom: As okay as someone who's head explodes on a regular basis can be.
 

>Well, since he ditched me for Chibi-Usa, I am going to have some fun
>myself."
 

Tom: I still don't get Usagi's mentality here... What reason does she have
to believe the love of her life dumped her to do the nasty with his future
daughter?

Crow: So she can have a flimsy excuse to twinkle her little brother?

Tom: No, Usagi's doing Shingo because he stole her panties.

Crow: Oh, of course!  Now it makes perfect sense!
 

>Usagi lubricate the new addition to her body with her own juice.
 

Crow: Oh please, let that new addition be silicone implants....
 

>Usagi spreads the butt cheeks of her brother. "Now you know what will
>happen if you steal my panty again."
 

Joel: Uh, Shingo?  You can jump in with your screams of protest and horror
anytime now....

Tom: Rei's still sitting on his face, remember?

Joel: Oh yeah.
 

>She position her penis to Shingo's anus.
 

Crow: <Haruka>  Hey, keep my name out of this!
 

>"For love and justice,
 

Tom: <singing>  Love is stronger than Justice....
 

>I am the pretty sailor-suited soldier Sailor Moon!
 

Joel: Try saying that three times fast.

Crow: That three times fast.

Tom: Zing!
 

>In the name of the moon, I will punish you!"
 

Joel: So Usagi shouts her catch phrases during sex?
 

>she shout her trademark phrases as she entered her brother.
 

Joel: Guess so.
 

>It was hard at beginning, but Rei lend a hand guiding her until it was
>buried for it entire length. Usagi began to pull it up and stroke gently.
 

Tom: I would think Shingo would be the one having the stroke about now.

Crow: Seriously, why is Shingo being so quiet?  Shouldn't he be screaming
his guts out in protest at this point?

Tom: Him?  What about us?

Joel: He's right....

All: ARRRRRRRRRRRGHH!!!!  MAKE IT STOP!!! MAKE IT STOP!!!
 

>"One, two, ......Ninety-eight, ninety-nine..."
 

Joel:  Hey look!  Someone must have fast-forwarded past the lemon.

Crow: Thank goodness for small favors!
 

>"No, it's one hundred already, moron."
>"What? Rei, you are the real moron, I am the one doing the deed."
>"I am not moron, moron."
 

Crow: Rei makes a convincing argument, doesn't she?

Joel: What *moron* wrote this stupid dialogue?
 
Tom: Tonight on Crossfire....
 

>"You are"
>"Not"
>"You are"
>"Not"
 

Crow: ARE SO!

Joel: ARE NOT!

Crow: ARE SO!

Joel: ARE NOT!

Tom: And remember folks, this dialogue is completely 100% DIC free!

Joel: They were so angry, they forgot to add exclamation points.
 

>"Oooh! What ever, it feels so good, I don't care anymore."
 

Tom: It's settled then.  They're both morons.
 

>"Yeahh, rig... Ooh!"
 

Crow: Usagi's drilling Shingo for oil?

Joel: Okay!  That's it!  You need a time-out, Crow!

Crow: Uh-oh!

(As Joel stands up, Crow tries to flee only to be grabbed by the head and
dragged off to the corner of the theater.  Tom bigsweats as he realizes he
is now alone to MST the fanfic.)

 
>All four of them reach climax at the same time and collapsed. After a
>little rest, Usagi use the "Moon Princess Halation" again, again,
>again.........
 

Tom: (glancing behind him)  Hey, Dr. F!  The fanfic is skipping!
 

>She and Shingo get home just in time for the curfew. Usagi was happy.
 

Tom: Shingo, on the other hand....
 

>"Luna, you don't need to lick me anymore.
 

Tom: Oh yuck!  I knew it!  In Sailor Moon lemons, where hermaphrodites
go, bestiality follows!
 

>Shingo should had learned his lession and do it."
 

Tom: So for those of you just joining us, Shingo will be licking Usagi
from now on.
 

>But not tonight, she is going to experiment with the power of Luna
>transformation pen.
 

Tom: Can she transform this piece of crap into a fanfic?
 

>Masturbation will never be the same for her.
 

Tom: Thus began the new lemon saga: "Usagi's Usual Evenings...."

(Joel walks back onto the camera and takes his seat.)

Tom: Where's Crow?

Joel: Over by the theater doors, sulking.

Tom: (glancing over at the doors)  No he isn't.  The doors are open.

Joel: They are?   You mean, the lemon is over?

Tom: Either that or Umino ran out of ideas....

Joel: I can't see how Umino can complain about DIC's version of
Sailor Moon when this lemon was *NOTHING* like the original
Japanese version, save the names....

Tom: And what was with the deal with the hermaphrodite bit?  Is Umino
trying to be Oscar's successor or what?

Joel: Oh well.  Let's get out of here before Dr. F decides to give us a
short too....
 

* * *
 

DEEP 13
 

 "Well, that's another one in the can.  Push the button, Frank."

 Dr. Forrester looked around him and suddenly noticed his
assistant was nowhere in sight.  Grumbling, Dr. Forrester stormed over
toward Frank's room.  When he opened it, he was surprised to see Frank
hunched over his desk, scribbling furiously on a piece of paper.

 "What are you up to, Grapehead!"  Dr. Forrester inquired gently.

 Frank paused in his scribbling and looked up.  "I've got something
important to say, and I think you should hear it."  Frank replied in a serious
tone of voice.

 "Oh?"  Dr. Forrester replied, interested despite himself.

 "Uh-huh."  Frank nodded at him before continuing.  "After
careful deliberation, I've decided that Umino is right.  It's not fair that
DIC should edit out all the panty shots in Sailor Moon.  This kind of
slash and hack editing has to be stopped!  Therefore, I've taken the liberty
of organizing a grassroots campaign to stand up against this travesty!
The S.O.P Campaign!"

 "S.O.P.?"  Dr. Forrester replied, confused.

 "Save Our Panties!"  Frank exclaimed.

 Dr. Forrester facefaulted.  Then he leapt back up, grabbing Frank
by his ear and dragged him out of his room.

 "THIS is what you've wasted my precious time for!?!  Get over to
the machine and push the button, already!!!"  Dr. Forrester snapped as he
shoved Frank towards the console and stalked back to his own room.

 "I'll bet Crow would like it...."  Frank muttered under his
breath as he pushed the button.

 
THE REAL END.
 

(Feel free to hum the closing theme as you read my author's notes.)
 

Hi again!  This MSTing was a little hard to finish as College and RL is
taking up more of my free time than I originally anticipated.  I was
anxious to move on to other things.  Now that it's finally done, my next
MSTing will either be another fic from Dr. Thinker or a particularly
awful Ranma 1/2 fanfic that someone was nice enough to send to me.
Have a personal favorite?  Let me know.

I'd like to give very special thanks to Robin "Lunari" Seabaugh, Gary
Kleppe and Jeffrey "Oneshot" Wong who were all very helpful in
giving me C&C and ideas for this MSTing.  I couldn't have finished
this MSTing without their help and I can't thank them enough.  :)

I'd also like to thank Timothy McLees, Luna and Artemis, Chris
Bergstrom, Jay Dee Archer (Jupiter Knight), Michael K. Neylon and
Sakura for being nice enough to post my MSTings on their webpages.  If
there's anyone else I missed, I apologize.

C&C, as always, is appreciated.  (fcasper@yesic.com)    Feel free to
send in any anime fanfics that you would like to see MSTed and I'll take
a look at it.  Also, if you're interested in seeing any previous episodes
of this series, I'll be happy to e-mail them to you.  ;)

Sincerely,

Megane 6.7

P.S. My friend, Lunari, has released another SM four-part mini-series
titled  "Justification" featuring Neo-Queen Serenity.  Like "Dying Fire",
it is a excellent story and if you are interested in reading it, contact her at
lunari@sprynet.com and I'm sure she'll be happy to send a copy to you.  :)
 

A MSTing for all Seasons
http://www.nabiki.com/mst
A full archive of all Mystery Science Theater 6.7 episodes, Megane 6.7
fanfiction, and collaborations!

Shizen's Versatile Home Page V3.0
http://svhp.webjump.com/  (Contains links to my MSTings and fanfics)
(Alternate site: http://www.tass.org/fanfic/MST3k/)

Shinji's Vault of Anime MSTings
http://lefty.simplenet.com/svam/
 

SEASON ONE
------------------

101- "GAMES" by Artemis  (SM Lemon)
102- "ARTEMIS'S LOVER"  (Original Draft)  by Oscar  (SM Lemon)
103- "SAILOR JUPITER VS. GODZILLA"  by The Flashman
(SM/GODZILLA CROSSOVER)
104- "JUDGE BRAINITITE" by Dr. Thinker  (SM Fanfic)
w/short "RANMA 1/2: ACCUSED PT. 1" by Karmin  (R1/2 Fanfic)
105- "THE WAR" by M. Llave  (R1/2 Fanfic)
106- "TRANSITIONS" by Richard Lawson  (Nuku Nuku Fanfic)
107- "HELLRAISERS" (Original Draft) by Aaron Eaton
(La Blue Girl/Overfiend/Original Crossover)
108- "MEN OF BOKKEN" by M. Llave  (R1/2 Fanfic)
109- "BISHOUJO SENSHI ROYAL RUMBLE" by Ken Hoinsky
(SM/WWF Crossover)
w/short "THE DINNER PARTY" by Chris Curzon  (SM/RL Crossover)
110- "XMAS SPECIAL: SAILOR MOON MEETS FATHER
CHRISTMAS" by Dr. Thinker  (SM Christmas Fanfic)

SEASON TWO
-------------------
201- "THAT GIRL"  PT. 1-2  by Oscar  (SM Lemon)
202- "VIRGIN WARRIOR SAILOR MOON" by Umino  (SM Lemon)
203- "*R*P*M*" by Flynn  (SM/SPAWN Crossover)
204- "RANKO'S LIFE" PT. 1-2  by Hitomi Ichinohei  (R1/2 Fanfic)
205- "TRAPPED" by Mr_Jazz  (SM Lemon)
206- "OSCAR TOON"  PT. 1-4 by Oscar  (SM/DBZ/WB Crossover)
207- "CALIFORNIA DREAMING" by Shakari
(Mutiple Crossover Lemon)
208- "A RANMA 1/2 FANFIC" PT. 1-2 by Sheep  (R1/2 Fanfic)
209- "TRIANGLE TANGLE" by CATS  (SM Lemon)
210- "URUSEI YATSURA: THE KIDNAPPING" by Shutaro Mendou
(UY Lemon)

SEASON THREE
----------------------
301- "A WET DREAM COME TRUE" by Mike Rhea  (R1/2 Lemon)
302- "TORTURED ECHO" PT. 1-4 by Trakal  (R1/2 Fanfic)
303- "RANMA KILLS!" PT. 1-2 by Sir Asayogure  (R1/2 Fanfic)
304- "OKONOMIYAKI SUMMER" by Mike Rhea  (R1/2 Fanfic)
w/short "UNDER THE MISTLETOE" by Mike Rhea  (R1/2 Fanfic)
305- "XMAS SPECIAL: A CHRISTMAS FIT FOR A POKEMON"
by Dr. Thinker  (Pokemon Christmas Fanfic)
306- "9-BALL DREAMS" PT. 1-2 by Mr_Jazz  (SM Crossover Lemon)
307- "WINTER" by Joseph Palmer  (R1/2 Fanfic)
308- "UKYO GETS WHAT SHE DESERVES" PT. 1-2 by R_Vincent
(R1/2 Lemon)

SHORTY!
-------------
101- SUBLIMINALLY SEDUCE WOMEN INSTANTLY!
102- THE UGLIEST WOMEN ON THE NET!
103- PHEROMONES!
104- THE INTERNET SPY AND YOU!!

OTHER MSTINGS I'VE CONTRIBUTED TO
---------------------------------------------------------
"DIMISIONAL TROUBLE" by Dr. Thinker  (SM Fanfic)
"MOONDUSTED" by Stephen Ratliff  (SM/TNG Crossover)

Shinji's Vault of Anime MSTings
http://lefty.simplenet.com/svam/

"THE COUNTESS CHRONICLES" by Lin Lin  (SM Dark Lemon)
"9 1/2 CHIPMUNKS" by Toon Dreams  (Rescue Rangers Yaoi Lemon)

Lefty's MSTings
http://lefty.simplenet.com/MSTings/index.htm

'MYSTERY WRESTLING THEATER 3000', POST 105: DOUBLE TROUBLE!
(Two interviews with the Ultimate Warrior and '3:16 Rulzs!' by Oracle)

Website Number 9 MSTings
http://neylonpc.engin.umich.edu/mst3k/mistings.shtml

"THE DAY OF EMERGENCE" by Jeffrey Lee
(Ranma 1/2/Eddings/SM Crossover)

"REDHEADS" by Robert Haynie
(Slayers/Ranma 1/2 Crossover)

Gary Kleppe's Comics and Manga Page
http://www.akane.org/gary/comics.html

OTHER GREAT WEBPAGES WORTH VISITING

Zoogz's Fanfiction and Fandom Page
http://www.nav.to/Zoogz

The Homepage of Jeffrey "Oneshot" Wong
http://www.anime.sobhrach.com\~jeffwong\index.html

'Suicide Blast' by: Keener
http://www.geocities.com/Tokyo/Temple/3342/Suicide.html
Additional links for Keener's stuff
-- http://tmffa.com/
-- http://www.redrival.com/myrriden/index.html

Flashman's Flash Point
http://www.geocities.com/Tokyo/Dojo/3105/

JOLT!!!
http://members.home.net/jolt.caffiene/welcome.htm

Website Number 9 MSTings
http://neylonpc.engin.umich.edu/mst3k/mistings.shtml

Lord Carnage's Cursed Fanboys Page!
http://carnage.fanfic.org

A Sailor Moon Romance
http://moonromance.simplenet.com/

Zen's Fanfiction Page
http://www.mindspring.com/~databank/fanfics.html

Webdragon's Lair
http://members.tripod.com/~WebDragon/

Sean Gaffney's Webpage
http://www.thekeep.org/~sean/index.html
 

"What? Rei, you are the real moron, I am the one doing the deed."
"I am not moron, moron." "You are" "Not" "You are" "Not"

 
Mystery Science Theater 3000 and its related characters and situations
are trademarks of and (c) 1998 by Best Brains, Inc. All rights
reserved.
 

Keep Circulating the Fanfics....