300... Computers Bled For This Piece of Crap.

I can sum up my problem with this movie in one word: Digital.

The blood effects were so ridiculously digital as to be actually insulting. Every time someone was killed, it looked like somebody fatally wounded a Pentium and it completely took me out of the movie. Digital blood, digital arrows, digital wounds, digital backgrounds and warriors, etc... I am so sick of this bullshit infecting more and more action movies and it’s time somebody with a brain started saving money and go back to more traditional and realistic methods. Seriously, watch Braveheart after this one and tell me which one has the more realistic battle scenes.

So, in closing, this movie sucked digital donkey dick. If you want brutality that involves more than a handful of ACTUAL human beings, rent Braveheart and fast forward to the battle scenes. It’s a helluva lot more satisfying and cheaper to boot.

Sincerely,

Megane 6.7

"Goldenboy" and the Art of Building a Career:

Good day to all out there in Bloggerland.

It's taken me three days to sufficiently calm down and rationalize in my head some of the events that had happened to me on 16 March (Friday), but I think I'm about ready to report them. But first, a segue!

Way back in the mid-90s, (I believe) ADV published a title called "Golden Boy". To sum up the story quickly, it was about a guy who was armed with a bicycle, a notebook, and a backpack... and instead of settling down at all, he went from place to place pretty much doing what he could. His backstory included him going to Toudai University and dropping out right before he was to complete a law degree.

Throughout the series, the main character took a multitude of positions: computer programmer, swimming instructor, political campaign worker, chef, and two others I can't think of. And he also ran across a girl at every job, but he ended up leaving on his bicycle before anything could happen. The title featured comedy and more than a bit of ecchi as well. I enjoyed the show back when I saw it in the mid-90s as my college's anime library had all six episodes. (Only six episodes, which is a bummer.)

In true Bill Cosby style, I tell you that story to tell you this one.

I have been graduated from university ever since 2002. For every February afterward with only one exception, I have worked at a different job ever since. IT support for one, sales support another, then two years of export, and this year import. And this leads to Goldenboy... much like him, I can't find the one thing that will help me to settle down and enjoy, have fun with what I'm doing... yet everywhere I go, I'm always learning.

And on Friday, I learned that once you're in a big corporation, you're the one bending over as they lube. How educational.

When I started at BigConglomCoInc. last October, I was doing import work; in essence, I was collecting information so that shipments could be cleared by Customs. Three months after I started, I was reassigned. At the time, I was told that it would be a position that would have more responsibility and that I would be given some time in order to grow into the position. And on top of this, I was given this position because the other person they offered it to declined.

Which brings us to Friday. On that fateful afternoon, I found out that I would be swapping jobs with someone else. Incidentally, it was with the someone else that declined this position the first time. I really do not know why this was done... after all, I was already in the position. It was three months after the fact. And I was finally achieving some level of a comfort zone with it.

The only highlight of the transaction was the fact that as near as I can tell, because my salary was never advanced when my responsibilities were raised, this new position will be closer to my current level of renumeration. But that's not exactly a happy thought, as I really did want them to raise my salary rather than to have this happen.

About the only other positive about this episode is that it may be what I need to inspire me. I have already hit the U.S. Federal job announcement board, and will be filing another FAFSA in order to see if I can go get my master's degree (or another bachelor's, depending on possible avenues). It is times like this that I'm re-reminded of that Goldenboy show, which usually ended with the main character pedaling away from that episode of his life. While my episodes last far longer than half-an-hour, it is events like this that confirm that my episodes will just keep going on rather than ending. And I can clearly remember leaving the last four towns that we used to live in, with a moving van and a hope that this departure will be the last one for a long time.

With this being said... does anyone want to buy a house?

More Movie Reviews: "Click"

Adam Sandler. Christopher Walken. People are of mixed opinions on the former, but tend to enjoy the latter's work. I actually don't mind Adam Sandler, and think that he can be funny at times. And "Click" seemed to have an interesting premise to it, so with our new Columbia House membership we bought this movie for a nickel.

And... well, it wasn't bad at least. The battle of minds between Adam Sandler and the goofy next-door neighbor's kid who boasts about his parents is funny at times. David Hasselhoff turns a good performance as Sandler's smarmy boss. And Henry Winkler, long past "Fonz" days, plays Grampa. All decent performances.

And Christopher Walken turns in a decent performance as the facilitator to the real star of the show, the remote. Yet somehow he never really threatens to turn in an A+ performance, he stays safely in the C+ "I'm not going to upstage the stars"-level of acting.

Which brings us to Adam Sandler himself. His movies always tend to have a certain attitude and sameness about them, and I can certainly understand why people would find his movies unpleasant. There was more than a bit of South Park-type humor, with some children swearing up a storm... while some people do enjoy this type of humor, I'm not a fan.

But this brings me to the very nature of the movie. If I knew the facts I'm going to disclose below before watching the movie, I may not have bothered. So...

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Fact #1: This movie skews away from "comedy" about forty-five minutes in.

Fact #2: This movie is one of those movies where years pass in seconds.

First, an explanation about Fact #2: I find movies that pass time like that extremely depressing. I don't know if it is because I start thinking, "What if this happens to me, I don't want to miss my life" or if there's another reason behind it... but I just don't like movies like this. The other best example I can name is a movie from the early 90s called "Sandlot", where the movie was about a bunch of boys for 95%, and the epilogue showed two of the main characters... about twenty-five years later. It's almost like reading a beginning and then an ending. I am very highly interested in the journey of life, and movies/books that skip stuff like that depress me even if it is supposed to be the point of the plot.

(Another uncomfortable movie for me was "Howl's Moving Castle", where the 16-year-old main character was changed into an old woman by means of a magic spell... but she does return to being young again. It's *still* uncomfortable to me though...)

If nothing else, you can treat my dislike of movies/stories like this like I treat people who don't like Adam Sandler movies... just to shrug, accept and move on. Though again, if someone had told me the two facts above, it would have made me avoid this movie, and after having seen it I would not have minded.

Anyway, for more spoilers, the remote in question is used to "fast-forward" Michael Newman (Adam Sandler) first one year in the future, to a promotion at work. Then the remote takes over and involuntarily fast-forwards Michael's life ten years in the future, to another promotion at work. Then six years in the future, to skip a long illness. And probably a couple more times that I completely missed (the credits allude to the younger daughter ending at 28, and my math doesn't add up). Towards the end, Adam Sandler's character had a heart attack somewhere around his early 50s and sees his kids only like once at ages 7/6, then once again at 17/16, and at the end at 29/28. And in the movie, he dies after a "heartwarming" family scene...

only to be revealed as a dream...

yet after the above reveal, Morty (Christopher Walken) has put the remote back in Michael's hands, with a note, in essence asking Michael if he learned his lesson. Yes, emphatically, Michael did, and he throws it out.

So be it. I just remember that this is the same Hollywood that grinds people underneath their heels and typically goes with 20-hour shooting schedules and the like. Not that the message is a bad one... far from it. I just think that the originator of the message should just... conform a bit more to it.

Anyway, if you think that Adam Sandler can pull off drama and you're not put off by the two facts outlined above, by all means check this movie out. But if you're uncomfortable about either fact, you might as well stick with the first forty-five minutes, and fast-forward to the end like Adam Sandler does.

Tons of movies that I could get to, but that'll be on later dates...

Today though, a topic that warms my heart literally. Today's topic is "Awakening from Winter Day". I live in Michigan, which definitely gets winter, and as a result every time I drive around during winter I see very few people on the sidewalks, out and about. The only place they typically walk is in parking lots, from cars to heated stores.

However, yesterday was the first day where the temperatures reached 50º(F) for more than three months. And while it wasn't exactly the warmest, it was nice to see people outside, walking around, enjoying the weather. I know that I miss those temperatures too, and I was finally able to recover my bicycle from storage to use it.

And while I love the day that Michigan truly escapes from winter, it also reminds me of the love-hate relationship I have with this state, and how I'd love to leave it. Oh well, that's a blog for another day...

Really Quick N' Dirty Rifftrax Reviews

Zoogz was nice enough to let me post stuff on his blog so to test it out, I've decided to give brief reviews of all the Rifftraxs I've seen thus far:

"Roadhouse" w/ Mike Nelson -- A great start for Mike, he obviously has great affection for this film and the rifftrax crackles with energy as a result. A must-have.

"The Fifth Element" w/ Mike Nelson & Disembaudio -- I don't know where all the hate for Disembaudio in this trax came from, personally I liked it a lot and didn't find Disembaudio's comments annoying at all but oh well. Another winner.

"Star Trek V" w/ Mike Nelson & Kevin Murphy -- Still my favorite trax so far, this one made Star Trek V an enjoyable experience for me and that's no easy feat. No surprise Kevin Murphy and Mike still work great together and it was great to see them in top form. Absolute must-have.
"Cocktail" w/ Mike Nelson. -- I might have given up on this one a little too soon, but I only listened to it once, hated the film and the Rifftrax didn't help. I usually listen to a trax twice before passing judgement. Oh well.

"xXx" w/ Mike Nelson. -- Another case of me hating the film, and more specifically its star, too much for me to enjoy the Rifftrax. It was okay, I guess.

"Crossroads" w/ Mike Nelson. -- This one had some laughs, not spectacular but solid and the movie was goofy enough to help me endure Britney Spears when she wasn't bouncing around in her panties.

"X-Men" w/ Mike Nelson and Bill Corbett. -- Readers of my MST6.7 series know I prefer Trace's Crow to Bill's but Bill's Crow can still bring the laughs for me at times. As for the rifftrax, I wanted to like this one, but the riffs just felt... forced a lot of the time and some of the humor just plain missed the mark for me. I did laugh at the MST3K ref near the beginning though.

"Top Gun" w/ Mike Nelson and Bill Corbett. -- For some reason, I didn't enjoy the teamup of Bill and Mike as much as Kevin and Mike, I just think the latter sound more natural together. I did enjoy this trax more than X-Men but overall, I found it a solid if unspectacular effort.

"Point Break" w/ Mike Nelson. -- Swayze plus Keanu plus Busey makes for some prime cheddar and Mike does a great job with this one. The movie is a little too long, especially the skydiving sequence but I still enjoyed it.

"Halloween" w/ Mike Nelson & Kevin Murphy. -- I'm not a fan of horror films but man, Halloween did not age well at all and the guys gleefully tear the film apart. The opening scene with Mike pretending to be John Carpenter coming home from work was just priceless and I thoroughly enjoyed this track.

"The Matrix" w/ Mike Nelson & Kevin Murphy. -- Well, I liked the film a lot and the rifftrax was decent too. Still, I probably like the film alone better if I had to choose but still, the rifftrax was fine.

"Star Wars: Episode One" w/ Mike Nelson & Kevin Murphy. -- The first time I listened to the trax, I laughed my butt off but also felt anger and sadness for the mess the new trilogy turned out to be and how much potential was wasted there. Then I watched it again a couple months later and just laughed my butt off. Plus they had a reference to a game made by a guy who once worked for Lucasarts! Cool, huh? Well, it is to me. ;P

"The Grudge" w/ Mike Nelson & Kevin Murphy. -- Another winner with Japanese jokes aplenty to boot. Those supposed death rattles always sounded like a forced burp to me too and while the "Lost" riffs went over my head (Haven't gotten around to watching it yet) I enjoyed this one a lot.

"LOTR: The Fellowship of the Ring" w/ Mike Nelson & Kevin Murphy. -- Another case of liking the film too much to seperate the trax at times, despite owning the extended version as well. Still a good trax but I just plain like the film by itself more.

"Island of Dr. Moreau" w/ Mike Nelson & Kevin Murphy. -- Didn't really like the film, the trax was good but the movie's a bitter pill to swallow when Marlon Brando isn't making a spectacle of himself. Too Apocolypse Now-ish which I also hated.

"Firewall" w/ Mike Nelson & Kevin Murphy. Lots of good riffs here on Harrison and the cliched plot. The film is a bit slow paced for my liking but the trax is solid and worth repeat listens.

"Nestor The Christmas Donkey" w/ Mike Nelson. -- Oh man, this was depressing. Mike's riffs helped but it's unlikely I'll be watching this one again.

"Reign of Fire" w/ Mike Nelson & Kevin Murphy. -- Another unpleasent dreary film but I liked the rifftrax for it more than Island of Dr. Moreau and while it may not be in my top five, it was good enough to be worth keeping.

"Swing Parade" w/ Mike Nelson. -- Haven't seen it yet.

"Daredevil" w/ Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy and Bill Corbett. -- This was just fantastic. All three were on their game and they really did a number on the film. I've been rewatching this one a lot lately.

"Battlefield Earth" w/ Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy and Bill Corbett. -- Unfortunately, I bailed on the film 40 minutes in or so and have yet to summon the courage to watch the rest of it so I can't fairly judge. I did like the laughtrack bit though.

"Troll 2" w/ Mike Nelson and Lowtax. -- Haven't seen it, probably never will.

"Star Trek VI" w/ Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy and Bill Corbett. -- This was fun, not as great as Star Trek V, IMHO, but still very good and well worth checking out.

"Over the Top" w/ Mike Nelson. -- This was great, nostalgic yet hilarious and Mike handled it really well. Loved the Stallone impressions too. I liked how Mike cracked up over 'The Smasher' and the whole rifftrax reminded me of Roadhouse, in the good way. One of my favorites. ;P

"Aeon Flux" w/ Mike Nelson & Kevin Murphy. -- Some great riffs here in the first half but it drags a bit in the latter half. Overall, it was a lame Matrix-ish clone but the rifftrax does a decent job ribbing on the film and its Oscar Award Winning star.

"Wicker Man" w/ Mike Nelson & Kevin Murphy. -- Well, I've only seen the film once so far but YIKES. The rifftrax was good as usual but the film was just horrible and for me, far more on the infuriating side than goofy. I may have to wait a couple of months before seeing it again to make a fair judgement but right now, it's not something I want to see again anytime soon.

"Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines" w/ Mike Nelson & Kevin Murphy. -- This was pretty funny, I liked Kevin's blatant ogling of the female Terminatrix even when Mike kept pointing out her homicidal flaws and Governor Arnold got his fair share of jabs too. I liked this one a lot.

"Lost: Season Premiere" w/ Mike Nelson & Kevin Murphy -- Haven’t seen it yet. Haven't even seen any of 'Lost' at all yet.

"Star Wars: Episode Two" w/ Mike Nelson & Kevin Murphy -- Chad Vader had about ten lines maybe during the whole rifftrax so he wasn’t really a factor. Overall, it was good, some good riffs on the oh-so-lame dialogue and painfully obvious CGI. There was a bit of recycling jokes from the last Star Wars trax and the whole poking fun at goofy names bit is getting tired IMHO though it didn’t ruin the track for me. I do wonder if Mike will ever
try tackling a film from the original Star Wars trilogy someday...

"Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory" w/ Mike Nelson & Neil Patrick Harris -- While the teamup of Mike Nelson & Kevin Murphy will always be my favorite, Neil Patrick Harris did a pretty good job here and worked very well with Mike. The movie was creepy and bizarre as always but the rifftrax really helped make a pleasureable experience out of a film that was pretty much unwatchable to me before. I'd easily rank this among the upper tier of Rifftrax released so far.

"Casino Royale" w/ Mike Nelson & Kevin Murphy -- Ah yes, the new Bond... Maybe this version of him is more faithful to the books but for me he wasn't nearly as fun and enjoyable as Pierce Bronson in "Goldeneye" and "Tomorrow Never Dies". When it comes to the movie version, I prefer entertainment to realism, though the Prince of Persia-esque chase sequence at the beginning was a nice touch. The rifftrax was pretty good for the majority of the movie with a few riffs (don't want to spoil them) making me laugh pretty hard. The last twenty- five minutes of the movie [Aw, Bond's in wuv!] or so dragged a bit for me but for the most part, the rifftrax was great.

"Eragon" w/ Mike Nelson & Kevin Murphy -- The first time I saw this movie, I was unimpressed but Zoogz implored me to give it a second chance so I did and to my surprise, I found myself enjoying it a lot more the second time through. I dunno, maybe I was just in a bad mood or something the last time because there were plenty of laugh-out-loud moments in this trax besides the CGI cracks. I can admit when I'm wrong and I can honestly recommend this rifftrax now.

"Glitter" w/ Mike Nelson & Mary Jo Pehl -- Haven't seen it yet. I want to, though, after hearing the 'X-Files: Fight the Future' rifftrax.

"Predator" w/ Mike Nelson -- Oh man, this was great. It must've been tough to come up with riffs for the endless walking and no dialogue scenes but he pulled it off pretty well overall. Definately much better the 2nd time through if you find yourself getting caught up in the movie the first time. There were lots of great riffs, I really don't want to spoil the majority of them but as a Gary Larson fan, the 'cow tools' reference was very much appriciated. ;P

"Grey's Anatomy: Season One, Episodes 1 & 2" w/ Mike Nelson & Bridget Nelson -- Haven't seen it yet.

"Fantastic Four" w/ Mike Nelson & Kevin Murphy -- I was a little surprised by this movie. Having avoided it in the theater and on DVD until now, I fully expected another disaster like 'Daredevil' but to my great surprise, it was actually half-decent, thanks in no small part to Michael Chiklis who I felt single-handedly saved this film from being unwatchable. The rifftrax for the film was great as Mike and Kevin slip into their usual awesome groove and pummel the film and it's characters mercilessly, especially Chris Evans. 'The Shield' references were also appriciated.

"Star Trek: Generations" w/ Mike Nelson & Kevin Murphy -- This film had the opposite effect on me as opposed to Eragon. Whereas my first review of this trax was positive, I checked it out again a couple of months ago and again today just to be sure and found it downright painful. The first fifteen minutes or so were amusing but once the film goes grim, it just seemed to drag on FOREVER and the quality of the rifftrax seemed to plunge with it into the murky depths to drown. There were a few gems, in regards to Data's one man show, Kevin Murphy absolutely NAILS the problem with the majority of the Star Trek TNG films with the line "You know, the Prime Directive of Star Trek should've been *NEVER DO COMEDY*. Unfortunately Mike and Kevin seemed far more comfortable with riffing TOS than TNG or maybe the film just sucked the energy out of them like it did me. I can’t really recommend this one anymore.

"300" w/ Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy and Bill Corbett. -- If you’ve read my previous review for ‘300’ http://www.nabiki.com/mst/zoogz/mst/blog/2007_03_01_archive.html then you already know my feelings about this film. Unfortunately, not even a rifftrax could save it for me. I just found the riffing kind of flat, too many repeated jokes on Sparta and the movie didn’t really lend itself well to Rifftraxing IMHO. Oh well.

"The Bourne Identity" w/ Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy and Bill Corbett. -- Ah, now this was a fun rifftrax. The first hour was among the best stuff they’ve ever done and had me laughing pretty consistently despite the film being rather bland and pedestrian taken by itself. Things slow down a bit, as does the film in the 2nd half, but overall, it was still very enjoyable and highly recommended.

"Independence Day" w/ Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy and Bill Corbett. -- This is my favorite of the three riffer Rifftraxs thus far. It was a pure joy from beginning to end for me with Mike, Kevin and Bill in top form. I can’t recommend this rifftrax enough, it was pure cheesy gold and probably my favorite trax next to Star Trek V. Highest recommendations.

Heroes" w/ Mike Nelson Haven’t seen it yet. -- (What can I say? The only TV series I own on DVD that aren’t animated are ‘The Shield’, ‘The Munsters’, ‘The A-Team’ and 'Whose Line Is It Anyway?'. ;P)

"Star Wars Episode III" w/ Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy and Bill Corbett. -- And the trilogy concludes with a pretty good Rifftraxing. I definately enjoyed this one more than Episode II, though part of that I’m sure is the fact that Episode III is a better film overall IMHO. Recommended.

"Raiders of the Lost Ark" w/ Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy and Bill Corbett. -- Well, I loved the original film and the rifftrax very nicely compliments it without being annoying or interfering with the enjoyment. I liked the callback riffs to ‘Firewall’ and other Ford films as well as the playful mocking of the music and characters. Highly recommended.

"Spider-Man" w/ Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy and Bill Corbett. -- Now this movie I didn’t care for at all but I hoped Rifftrax could make it enjoyable. Unfortunately, it didn’t work out that way for me and I found watching this movie even with the Rifftrax to be more of a chore than anything. Plus there was a rather unpleasant and unfunny gag at the end with Kevin crying hysterically over Mike beating him up. I see where they were trying to go with it but honestly, it just plain sucked and ended an already mediocre rifftrax on a rather sour note. Here’s hoping the next trio rifftrax can ascend back up to the quality of 'Independence Day' or 'Raiders' next time.

"Next" w/ Mike & Bridget Nelson -- I was dreading seeing this movie after 'Wicker Man' but to my surprise, the movie wasn't unwatchably awful. Silly and full of CGI car crashes but not awful. The rifftrax was quite good as well, Bridget and Mike worked well together and the husband/wife dynamic was pleasant yet cute without being nauseating at all. Recommended.

"Missile to the Moon" w/ Mike Nelson & Fred Willard -- Haven’t seen it yet.

"Transformers" w/ Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy & Bill Corbett -- Another movie I loathed with five times the bad comedy of Star Trek: Generations IMHO. Just to be clear, I'm not a fan of the cartoon either so this isn't a purist thing. But the worst part for me was I found this rifftrax painfully mediocre. I sensed a strong 'going through the motions' vibe to it and while there were a handful of funny riffs scattered about, I found the trax as a whole to be uninspired and cannot recommend it.

"Star Wars Holiday Special" w/ Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy & Bill Corbett. -- Wow. God bless the 70’s huh? I had never seen this special before now and I doubt anything I could say hasn’t been said before many times over. Without Rifftrax, this film probably would’ve killed me within the first 10 minutes of warbling wookie but thankfully Mike, Kevin and Bill delivered one of the best rifftrax treatments I’ve heard so far. It was obvious they were having a blast doing it too and they even made Bea Arthur’s singing bearable (though to be fair, despite it’s greater length, it still pales in comparison to the sheer horror of her rendition of ‘Do The Urkel’.) Having them riff old commercials was also a blast and something I hope they could do again someday if the opportunity present itself. As you’ve probably guessed by now, I absolutely LOVED this Rifftrax and it’s in my top five along with being my favorite of the Star Wars rifftraxs. Highest recommendations.

"Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer" w/ Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy & Bill Corbett. -- Having enjoyed the first movie rifftrax, I went into this one with slightly lowered expectations since the Star Wars Ep. 2 rifftrax wasn’t nearly as funny to me as Ep. 1 and they repeated many of the same jokes. To my pleasant surprise though, this rifftrax was just as funny if not funnier than the original. The trio do a great job roasting this film to a nice golden brown and they sound like they’re having a blast doing it, which is always a plus. Highly recommended.

"Plan 9 From Outer Space" w/ Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy & Bill Corbett. -- I originally got this movie with just Mike’s commentary track from Legend Films and I somewhat enjoyed it then but this do-over with all three riffers is a big improvement, especially with the final 15-20 minutes of the film which had a fair amount of dead spots in the original commentary. And while there was some riff repeats from that original commentary, it didn’t hamper my overall
enjoyment of the rifftrax. Recommended.

"Jurassic Park" w/ Mike Nelson & Weird Al Yankovic. -- Ah, finally! I’ve been waiting for Al to be a guest commentator for a while now and he didn’t disappoint. Both he and Mike do a great job of riffing this film and I pretty much enjoyed the trax from start to finish. Very highly
recommended.

"Batman & Robin" w/ Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy & Bill Corbett. -- Folks, if you ever had the unfortunate... "pleasure" of watching this film, even on free TV with seemingly nothing else to watch... I recommend renting or buying Batman: The Animated Series on DVD and NEVER watch another live action Batman film again. I know Batman Begins supposedly saved the franchise but trust me, Batman TAS will always be better than live action. Always. That being said, this Rifftrax was a mixed bag. On one hand, it had some really funny riffs, all written by the fans. On the other, we had some rather large gaps near the end of the film and every second of the film not Rifftraxed is pure agony. Plus the riffing sounded rather stiff at times due to the script not being written by them. Still, the trax did end on a funny note and it’s worth checking out overall.

"The Matrix Reloaded" w/ Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy & Bill Corbett. -- Hmm, well the rifftrax for this was definitely good, but when the film doesn’t involve an action or Yuen Woo Ping wire sequence, (I refuse to besmirch the good name of chop socky with THIS film), it is just painfully dull. Don’t get me wrong, the rifftrax definitely helped a LOT but the film is still such a chore for me to watch regardless. I wish this was an MST3K episode so they could edit out the boring stuff. Seriously, I’ve played RPGs that were less pretentious and dull than this movie as a whole. To be fair, the rifftrax was funny and I probably will listen to it again in the future, but definitely not on a regular rotation.

"Beowulf" w/ Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy & Bill Corbett. -- Now this was a fun movie, and far more enjoyable than "300". Putting CGI characters instead of live ones in a CGI world for a seamless experience, who would’ve thought that would actually work! Sarcasm aside, this movie still has quite a bit of cheese and the riffers do a great job with it, making this one of the more enjoyable recent rifftraxs I’ve listened to. Highly recommended.

"Safety: Harm Hides at Home" w/ Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy & Bill Corbett. -- I've only watched a few of the shorts so far and found the majority of them to be okay but nothing to write home about really. This short, however, is quite good and goofy. Kinda like a 1970's Mr. B Natural only tamer. It's definately more than worth the 99 cents to get though.

"Spiderman 3" w/ Mike Nelson & James Lileks. -- James who? That was basically my reaction but okay, I liked Neil Patrick Harris and Weird Al with Mike so I gave James a chance. But once again, the movie was just a total bitch to get through and the rifftrax failed to make it bearable. Actually the rifftrax in general was kinda lifeless as well but that may be the fault of the movie more than anything. Needless to say, I won't be chomping at the bit to get the rifftrax for 'Spiderman 2'... ^_^;

"One Got Fat: Bicycle Safety" w/ Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy & Bill Corbett. -- This short was an odd mix of disturbing and goofy. It would almost be depressing if it weren't so frigging goofy. One by one kids fail to use common sense with their bicycles and get maimed but onward they trek, with their monkey masks and cheap wire tails towards their ultimate reward of lunch. As you might expect, this short is very riffable and while it's not quite as good as Safety: Harm Hides at Home, it's still worth checking out.

"Cloverfield" w/ Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy & Bill Corbett. -- This was a tough one to judge. On the one hand, the rifftrax did a good job and had me laughing many times. The film however was not very pleasant for me at all. Imagine making a Godzilla movie and taking all the fun and cheesiness out of it. Then add some stomach churning camerawork, some blatant '9/11' imagery (which I'm surprised wasn't commented on by the riffers considering how they jumped all over X-Men for using the Holocaust as a plot point), and reduce 80% of the dialogue to 'Oh my god' and 'Dude', which got old VERY fast. Some people on the Rifftrax board seemed to think this movie was too good for Rifftrax to tackle, I couldn't disagree more, this film SUCKS. Still, the rifftrax was good and I can recommend it but if you've never seen the film, don't be surprised if it leaves a bad taste in your mouth.

"Star Trek New Frontiers: World Enough and Time" w/ Kevin Murphy & Bill Corbett. -- Well, the fanfilm was surprisingly well done, but I found the rifftrax to be rather average, not bad but nothing special either.

"LOTR: The Two Towers" w/ Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy & Bill Corbett. -- Much like the last LOTR rifftrax, it was good but I kept losing myself in the movie. If you liked the Fellowship rifftrax, you'll like this one too.

"X-Files: Fight the Future" w/ Bill Corbett & Mary Jo Pehl. -- I've mentioned in the past that I wasn't a fan of Pearl Forrester but Mary Jo Pehl as herself did a great riffing this film with Bill Corbett. I've never been a fan of the X-Files but this trax made the movie a real hoot and I highly recommend it. Now if I can only find a used copy of 'Glitter' rotting at some garage sale...

"Alien" w/ Kevin Murphy & Bill Corbett. -- Okay, I know this movie is a horror classic and such, but I always prefered the sequel for its incredible adrenaline rush that still hold up over 20 years later. Thankfully Kevin and Bill do a great job riffing this film and I thoroughly enjoyed this rifftrax. I would go into more detail but I honestly don't want to spoil anything, very highly recommended.

"The Sixth Sense" w/ Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy & Bill Corbett. -- I had a feeling I wouldn't enjoy this one but I took a chance anyway. I already knew the surprise twist so I suppose I can't judge the film fairly since I pretty much knew what was coming for the most part. The rifftrax was just sort of there for this one, nothing to write home about and rather dull to boot. Not recommended.

Well, that's it for now. I guess I'll keep updating this post as the rifftraxs come. ;P

Sincerely,

Megane 6.7